For two years my life was consumed by ovulation tracking, mucous monitoring, blood tests, ultrasounds, hormones and planned intercourse. I had no control over the final outcome, yet it was controlling every aspect of my life. Eventually, I became unrecognisable … a scared, broken version of my former self. I withdrew from the people who loved me most, and I felt anger towards people I had never met. But I disliked myself the most.
When James was born, the ever-famous Dr Rad was doing his ever-amazing job by asking me about my plans regarding our next pregnancy. At the time, I snorted at him…literally – it got the same response as when I was asked about birth control while James was still in hospital! I mean c’mon mate, the only thing stimulating my nipples right now is an expressing kit! Anyway…I digress. So Dr Rad was keen to know sooner rather than later if James was going to be a big brother, and for good reason (which I can appreciate now). I eventually answered with apprehension that we had initially planned to have another baby down the track, but at this stage we simply felt blessed to have our one healthy miracle staring back at us from inside his humidicrib. I couldn’t even think about the possibility of another baby after the emotional turmoil we had endured. It had taken absolutely everything to finally get our little guy and he had changed my perspective on absolutely everything! I went from wanting and needing three babies, to being utterly content with just him. That previous greed seemed absolutely ridiculous. Of course, all Dr Rad took from that was ‘we had initially planned to have another baby down the track’ (bless his cotton, checkered socks!) – he referred me to a reputable maternal fetal medicine doctor for pre-pregnancy planning ‘just in case’.
We have been working on our nursery since we first started trying to get pregnant – this is over 2 years of visualizing and planning that has finally come to life. When I say ‘we’, you all know what I mean: Scott has been inundated with my constant crazy gushing over pinterest ‘ohhhh, how cute is thiiiiis?!’ without actually having any input. He’s lucky I even gave in and let him put his little Star Wars Itty Bitty on the shelf!
I recently had another obstetrician appointment following my scan at the Women’s & Children’s. This day, he was running a little late, so I was seated in the waiting room with a few other Mum’s and their children. I was unfortunately reminded (once again) that people are insensitive, inconsiderate and downright mean! The parents started doting over each other’s children (and when I say doting, I mean comparing), when one Mum blatantly said to another Mum ‘your boy can’t be 3, he’s so tiny and looks like a 1 year old’. I was absolutely flabbergasted – I actually can picture myself now sitting there wide eyed with my mouth gaping open! Did she just say this out loud?...
After an anxious month, I am actually feeling the best I have felt since falling pregnant – I have energy, a beautiful growing bump, and – most importantly – I can feel Baby Purls moving about many times throughout the day, almost to reassure me ‘Hey Mum, I’m fine!’ So I didn’t even feel worried going to my ‘second opinion’ ultrasound at the Women’s & Children’s Hospital this week. It’s almost as though Iknewhe was ok – I finally had that feeling of utter content. As I write this I can hear Scott heckling me saying ‘yeah but what about the 6 repetitive nightmares you had before the appointment!’ Pipe down, mate!
So at this point, what we knowfor certain(!)is that our boy is breech in the right horn of my bicornuate uterus, with his head ‘squished’ near the septum at the top and his feet poking out into the left horn at the bottom (I wish I was an artist so I could draw this for you – but see pic below to get some idea of the shape and you can imagine where he’s hanging out!). His measurements are all normal and he is even slightly ahead in size, but his head is narrow due to the position he is in. We have been told that his head should continue to grow as needed, but the shape may be affected (luckily baby’s skulls are malleable!). We continue to be high risk and require close monitoring with input from specialists, but Scott and I feel like the strongest people in the world right now, and baby Purls is a fighter!
We’ve made it to 20 weeks pregnant and what an amazing ride! This blog will share the ups and downs of our pregnancy so far. While it has been the most exhilarating and gratifying time of our lives, it hasn’t been without worry (of course – I can’t do anything the easy way!) My previous blog mentioned briefly that I have a double uterus and experienced some early pregnancy bleeding, which is what I will touch on today. Be prepared to be educated!
For two years my life was consumed by ovulation tracking, mucous monitoring, blood tests, ultrasounds, hormones and planned intercourse.
When James was born, the ever-famous Dr Rad was doing his ever-amazing job by asking me about my plans regarding our next pregnancy. At the time, I snorted at him…literally – it got the same response as when I was asked about birth control while James was still in hospital! I mean c’mon mate, the only thing stimulating my nipples right now is an expressing kit! Anyway…I digress. So Dr Rad was keen to know sooner rather than later if James was going to be a big brother, and for good reason (which I can appreciate now). I eventually answered with apprehension that we had initially planned to have another baby down the track, but at this stage we simply felt blessed to have our one healthy miracle staring back at us from inside his humidicrib. I couldn’t even think about the possibility of another baby after the emotional turmoil we had endured. It had taken absolutely everything to finally get our little guy and he had changed my perspective on absolutely everything! I went from wanting and needing three babies, to being utterly content with just him. That previous greed seemed absolutely ridiculous. Of course, all Dr Rad took from that was ‘we had initially planned to have another baby down the track’ (bless his cotton, checkered socks!) – he referred me to a reputable maternal fetal medicine doctor for pre-pregnancy planning ‘just in case’.
We have been working on our nursery since we first started trying to get pregnant – this is over 2 years of visualizing and planning that has finally come to life. When I say ‘we’, you all know what I mean: Scott has been inundated with my constant crazy gushing over pinterest ‘ohhhh, how cute is thiiiiis?!’ without actually having any input. He’s lucky I even gave in and let him put his little Star Wars Itty Bitty on the shelf!
I recently had another obstetrician appointment following my scan at the Women’s & Children’s. This day, he was running a little late, so I was seated in the waiting room with a few other Mum’s and their children. I was unfortunately reminded (once again) that people are insensitive, inconsiderate and downright mean! The parents started doting over each other’s children (and when I say doting, I mean comparing), when one Mum blatantly said to another Mum ‘your boy can’t be 3, he’s so tiny and looks like a 1 year old’. I was absolutely flabbergasted – I actually can picture myself now sitting there wide eyed with my mouth gaping open! Did she just say this out loud?...
After an anxious month, I am actually feeling the best I have felt since falling pregnant – I have energy, a beautiful growing bump, and – most importantly – I can feel Baby Purls moving about many times throughout the day, almost to reassure me ‘Hey Mum, I’m fine!’ So I didn’t even feel worried going to my ‘second opinion’ ultrasound at the Women’s & Children’s Hospital this week. It’s almost as though I knew he was ok – I finally had that feeling of utter content. As I write this I can hear Scott heckling me saying ‘yeah but what about the 6 repetitive nightmares you had before the appointment!’ Pipe down, mate!
So at this point, what we know for certain(!) is that our boy is breech in the right horn of my bicornuate uterus, with his head ‘squished’ near the septum at the top and his feet poking out into the left horn at the bottom (I wish I was an artist so I could draw this for you – but see pic below to get some idea of the shape and you can imagine where he’s hanging out!). His measurements are all normal and he is even slightly ahead in size, but his head is narrow due to the position he is in. We have been told that his head should continue to grow as needed, but the shape may be affected (luckily baby’s skulls are malleable!). We continue to be high risk and require close monitoring with input from specialists, but Scott and I feel like the strongest people in the world right now, and baby Purls is a fighter!
We’ve made it to 20 weeks pregnant and what an amazing ride! This blog will share the ups and downs of our pregnancy so far. While it has been the most exhilarating and gratifying time of our lives, it hasn’t been without worry (of course – I can’t do anything the easy way!) My previous blog mentioned briefly that I have a double uterus and experienced some early pregnancy bleeding, which is what I will touch on today. Be prepared to be educated!
